Rewind, Rewind!

Taking a trip down memory lane can evoke so many emotions. Passion, fear, sadness, disappointment, joy, confidence... the nostalgia reminiscent of moments past.
What makes fleeting seconds stick in our minds long after they pass? The scent that is so distinctly clear, the music playing in the background, the cold against your skin... you remember it all. But why? What makes this memory special?
I could write anthologies on all the memories that never fail to cross my mind, every single day. The memories of my husband before we were nothing more than friends. I would say those are the sweetest memories I have of us. Sweeter than our wedding or even our life after.
Many years ago, when I was around 16 years old, I was visiting my cousin over summer break. I woke up one night to find her holding her knees to her chest and crying... She said to me, "Never fall in love with your best friend." I did not understand the magnitude of what she was saying then. Why would I NOT want to fall in love with my best friend? It was the most logical thing to do... And that is exactly what I did. I fell in love with my best friend. But with that love and the expectations that follow in any relationship, our relationship changed. It stopped being simple. Expectations complicate things. Expectations every one around you has for you; leave alone the expectations you have of each other. And the disappointment (fear?) of those expectations not being fulfilled. When we were getting married, a friend told us that the first thing to remember in marriage is to have no expectations. The more expectations you have, the more likely it is that you feel let down. So true! But is this what complicates relationships? When we were just friends, we had fights, but they were so simple. Easy to resolve, easy to let go of. Why does this change after marriage? I'd like to understand.
For this precise reason, it is important that the relationship evolving into marriage is strong to withstand all the nonsense that societal and individual guidelines constrain us to. 'Coz with marriage come familiarity, comfort, support. And also come expectations, rules, regulations, nuances of daily life... The magic and sparks seldom coexist with marriage. A reality that is hard to escape and harder to accept.
An alternative thought would be that THIS comfort is what is most sought after... ask those in unreliable, noncommittal relationships. Who knows if you will be together tomorrow? Who knows if you will have someone to go home to after a long day? Those are the small yet pleasurable things about marriage. It is sort of like a trade off really... You trade the magic and curiosity for the comfort and familiarity. The X factor disappears. I don't think they can coexist.
Would you disagree? Do tell me...